Sunday, April 15, 2012

A Strong Man

it takes a strong man to master their asses.in the meantime, how about some grand tetons!
*
the elephant is in a funk because it's irrelevant. therefore, call it an irrelephant.
*
quohog brought the eggnog while quopeg brought the nutmeg.
*
she enters through the back door.she writes seven truths on a wall in the living room.then she leaves through the front door.
*
i dont have a problem with caffeine...i have a problem without caffeine...
*
many a legal client has wanted a new attorney. it's rarely when an attorney wants a new client...
*
spruce up your locomotive love life with four pills a day.
*
if nothing else I'd sing for you, of you and...if I'm lucky...to you.
*
i love you from the bottom of my deck of cards...
*
you don't need a sledgehammer. you debase your own life easily enough without anyone else's help.

thank you. it's nice to know i have fans out there.

*
if you're an unsavory character, does that make you sweet?
*
go fuck yourself on a stake of stupid.
*
your greed is so deep it actually makes me want to sell everything I own and live on the floor.
*
you can't silence my love.
*
i'm just a holy fool. oh baby! it's so cruel.
*
i don’t know what makes you so dumb but it really works.
*
i'm sick. i have an excuse for that. would you like to see my doctor’s note or just the prescriptions?
*
the sun shines out my ass, but you never bother to look.
*
your false teeth and real feet have never felt better.
*
big gut, small dick, and terrible personality...yeah baby...i'm totally turned on by you...
*
i think i might fall…either in love with her...or out of a tree and into a big bowl of chocolate pudding...don't know why the powers that be say i must choose one or the other...
*
it's a sad fact of life, but...the forces of gravity always bring us down.

i disagree. gravity is an illusion. in reality, the world sucks.

*
fingers
from those hands
hands
from those arms
arms
from those shoulders
shoulders
from that trunk
trunk
from that body 

singular
in and of and by 

itself
*
she left town and was about 5 miles from the state line before anyone knew she was gone.

she took with her scarlet secrets and golden coins in an offwhite gunny sack.

*
baby...i'm hot for you...and f80 too...

good sir...i'm not for you...and f80 just ain't for you too...you ought to try f42

*
it isn't now or never. it's now or next week.

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Declining Versus Refusing

I used to be a newspaper reporter and wrote for a living. Therefore, I have an eye that's sharper than average for the use of the English language.

For example, when a public official was asked to comment about an incident, especially one that was controversial, he/she would be said to decline comment.

That is, his or her reply would be polite. It would be usually "No thanks" or "I have nothing to say about it."

But if he or she refused comment, it was impolite.

If the reporter asked the person face to face, he (it usually is a male) could knock the notebook from the reporter's hand and say, "Fuck you for asking me about that shit!"

IF the reporter was asking the question over the telephone, he'd say the same thing and then slam down the phone.

Devil In The Flesh

Somewhat related to the post below.

Overheard recently in a restaurant:

Teresa: Oh that Susie! She's a terrible person! She's worse than Hitler! She's the Devil in the flesh!

Jennifer: Oh, Terrie, she's not that bad.

Teresa: Okay, Jennie. That Susie's a bitch.

Jennifer: WATCH YOUR MOUTH! DON'T YOU EVER CALL A WOMAN A BITCH AROUND ME!

Just Want You To Know

It's spring, and Mary Jane's back.