One Mean Pizza

"Hey -- you oughta get a pizza from Iaccobetti!" a friend told me.

"Never heard of them," I said.

"It's a new store. And they make a mean pizza there!"

"Okay. I'll try it."

So one weekend night, I called Iaccobetti's and ordered a pizza -- a large with pepperoni, black olives and mushrooms.

The driver brought it to my home. I paid him and took the pie inside.

On the lid, it said -- "ARE YOU SURE YOU NEED THIS, FAT ASS?"
*
That's when I woke up.