Dave had just perfected what he thought was a slick move to steal a kiss from a woman.
On a day with Anne, he told her, "I think there's something in your eye. Let me get it out for you."
There wasn't anything in her eye. But as he leaned in to try to get it ...
He stuck his finger in her eye.
Dave had to take Anne to the hospital. He had hoped the date wouldn't end in the emergency room -- he had hoped it might've ended in her living room with a hot make-out session, on in her bedroom with some hot sex.
She had to get an eye patch for her injury.
There would be no second date -- obviously.
A week later, Dave saw Anne. She was still wearing the eyepatch.
With her still-good, uncovered eye, she gave him one of those looks that would've killed him if they could've done so.
Is there a statue of limitations for stealing a kiss?
A lot of guys have tried to steal a kiss from the object of their affections. In response, they committed assault and battery upon those guys.
That's a time where the punishment did not fit the crime.