you don't think

you don't think.
therefore, you ain't.
*
kids don't learn how to hate; they can do that well enough by themselves. but they do learn who and what to hate.
*
he worshiped every penny he ever earned as if it was a kiss from god ...
*
under the first amendment, it's all right to call a guy an asshole. it's not ok to cut him a new one.
*
what's worse -- shit or fuck?
answer this -- which would you rather do in your bed?
*
if something floats your boat, sometimes it just might sink your ship.
*
she'll land on her feet. but she'd be better off on her knees.
*
i prevail in my travails ...
*
i bought a camouflage shirt last week and put it in my closet.
now i can't find it.
(from comedian john fox)
*
my mother always told me to say something good about the dead. so when i heard that the biggest bastard i knew was dead, i said: "GOOD!"
*
i've heard of a hang nail, but i've never heard of a hang hammer or hang saw.
i've also heard of a hangman, but never heard of a hang woman.
*
practice makes perfect.
that's why men want to have sex as much as they can -- to get better.
*
the troubles that hit him that month were like an army. they didn't come to him as single soldiers but in batalions.
(paraphrase from shakespeare.)
*
bushes are nothing more that gnarly cousins to trees.
*
rover, before he entered the big sleep
because of a terminal illness
i load my gun
with the greatest of care
and the deepest of love
then aim it between
your lovefilled
and trusting
eyes.
*
one just in time for valentine's day:

it's not
you ...
it's me.

no.

dammit.

i'm lying.

it is you.