Charlie Besser, a mail carrier, was making his rounds on the last day before his retirement. After 35 years on the job, he was ready to move to Florida where he could fish year round.
He had just dropped off the mail at his last house on his route and had turned around to go back to the post office when he heard the door open and a voice say:
"Charlie, wait a minute."
He turned around and saw Sally Smith in the doorway. She was wearing a flimsy robe.
Now, Sally was a good-looking woman. Charlie would've sold his soul to the devil to fuck her -- even to see her naked.
"Yes, Mrs. Smith?" Charlie said.
"Please ... call me Sally. OK?" she said.
"OK."
"I heard that you're retiring from the post office."
"Yep. Today's my last day."
"Wait there, Charlie. I have some things for you."
She went into the house and came back with a cake.
"It's a chocolate marble cake. If I'm right, you told me once that it was your favorite."
"It is, Sally. Thanks."
"I also have something else for you," Sally said and gave him an envelope.
He opened it and found a card wishing him well during his retirement and a $20 bill.
"Thanks for all the gifts," he said.
"Charlie ... I have one more gift for you."
She opened her robe and revealed to Charlie that she was naked underneath it. She put her arms around him, gave him a big French kiss, and began to grind against him.
She then took him by the hand and led him upstairs to her bedroom, where for the rest of the afternoon it was:
RIDE SALLY RIDE!
When they were through, Charlie said to Sally, "I appreciate the cake and the card and the $20, and that hot fuck we had, but ... I wonder why you went through all that for me?"
Sally said, "Last week I was talking to my husband about what to give you for your retirement. He said, 'Fuck the postman. Give him a card with some money in it.'"
She paused, then added:
"But the cake was my idea."
Saturday, February 13, 2010
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