a highway patrolman pulled over a car.
"is there a problem, officer?" the driver said.
"no, there isn't," the patrolman said. "but -- congratulations."
"what for?" the driver said.
"because you're wearing your seat belt as required by law, you've just won $1,000 in a statewide safety competition," the patrolman said.
"great!" the driver said.
"by the way, sir -- what do you plan to do with the money?" the patrolman asked.
"well, i guess i'm going to get a driver's license," the driver said.
then a woman in the passenger seat said, "oh, don't listen to him -- he's a smart ass when he's drunk."
this woke up a man who was in the back seat. he took one look at the patrolman and said, "i knew we wouldn't get far in a stolen car."
at that moment, there was a knock from the trunk. a voice said, "ey, senor -- como nosotos salto la frontera?"*
*in english: "uh, sir -- are we over the border yet?"